The Blessing of Church Discipline

The following is a sermon manuscript preached on September 24, 2023, at Redeeming Grace Church in Kentucky.

Matthew 18:12-20

12 “What do you think? If any man has a hundred sheep, and one of them goes astray, will he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains, and go and search for the one that is lost? 13 And if it turns out that he finds it, truly I say to you, he rejoices over it more than over the ninety-nine that have not gone astray. 14 So it is not the will of your Father who is in heaven for one of these little ones to perish.15 If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother. 16 But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. 18 Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven. 20 For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.

Introduction

Our text this morning displays three steps for Church Discipline: 1) reveal your brother’s sin to him in private, 2) take two or three witnesses with you to address the sin, and 3) take the issue to the church. This text must be understood in light of the Parable of the Lost Sheep that immediately precedes it. In this parable, Jesus asks a rhetorical question, “If any man has a hundred sheep, and one of them has gone astray, does he not leave the ninety-nine on the mountains and go and search for the one that is straying?” Of course, a good shepherd goes and finds the straying sheep and rejoices once he finds him. Jesus tells his audience, “So it is not the will of the Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones perish.”

That statement in verse 14 is serious because it makes an explicit claim about what the will of God is not. You see, in this text and all throughout the New Testament, sheep are believers. Goats are on the other hand, or those who are sinners who die and ultimately spend eternity in hell. So, according to Matthew 18:14, it is not the will of the Father that any believer, any person chosen in Him before the foundation of time, should perish. So, Jesus being the Good Shepherd, when his sheep stray, goes and gets the sheep and brings him back into the fold, celebrating as the apex of the event.

You, my brothers and sisters, are the sheep. And often, I think the church has thought of this passage in Matthew 18:12-14 as completely separated from Matthew 18:15-20. I know I have. But that is not how Matthew presents the inspired text to us. By placing the story of the lost sheep immediately before verse 15, Matthew shows us that one of the ways that Jesus “goes and gets the lost sheep” is through the church – by sending his people who are not presently straying to go and get those who are presently straying to bring them back into the fold.

The Text

My goal today is to focus on your role in Church Discipline. Therefore, my primary focus will be on verses 15-17. So upfront, I want to address verses 18-20 very briefly but not ignore them because it is important that we understand them in their context, lest we run amuck the word of God.

Matthew 18:18-20

18 Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say to you, that if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven. 20 For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst.

First, we must understand the context of these verses to deal with them rightly. I’ve heard many a man or woman of God quote verse 20 out of context claiming all sorts of things to be loosed in the name of Jesus. Verse 20 is a promise that when we step through the process of bringing in two or three witnesses to restore a brother to Christ, that God will be there with us, for us. Regarding these verses, Jay Adams says, “Christ is saying: your act on earth is but a reflection and outworking of what has already been judged by God in heaven. The words ‘binding’ and ‘loosing’ were terms familiar to Jewish ears and were used roughly as the equivalent of our terms ‘prohibit’ and ‘permit.’ Thus, one was prohibited or permitted communion with the Lord’s people.”[1] So, when taken in context, we see that God’s presence is certainly with us in a unique way when we obey him by following verses 15-17. I think verses 18-20 are there to encourage those of us who approach confronting the sin of another is uncomfortable or inconvenient. But now that we have a good grasp of God’s assurance to honor our obedience, let us look at the text today. Matthew 18:15-17.

v.15 - “If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private”

I want to be very cautious as I approach this text today. On one hand, we see that it is God’s will that we, as brothers and sisters in the faith, are able to lovingly give and receive correction for our sins. On the other hand, we may be tempted to think of ourselves as loftier than we ought to as if it is our job to hand out citations all around the church. So, we must find a biblical balance when we approach others about their sin and that balance comes from Ephesians 4:15. We must speak, “truth in love.” When we think about confronting others about their sins, we must speak truth in love. That is, factually accurate words motivated by reconciliation.

Again, the term brother shows us the brothers in the faith and puts this in the context of the church. This passage is not primarily evangelistic in nature as if we are preaching the Gospel to the lost. No, this text is for a believer to go to his brother or sister in Christ because that brother or sister is a sheep who has gone astray, not a goat destined for hell.

The term private is very helpful because initially, we may ask, am I supposed to go around showing everybody everywhere their sins? No, rather sins that occur in private should be addressed in private. Again, Jay Adams is helpful in describing what type of sin Matthew is talking about here. He writes, “We must learn, in love, to forgive and pass by many slights, annoyances, and offenses.” The scripture testifies to this in Proverbs 19:11, “A man’s discretion (se-kel – understanding/insight) makes him slow to anger, And it is his glory to overlook a transgression.” And again in Proverbs 10:12, “Hatred stirs up strife, But love covers a multitude of sins. “Adams continues, saying, “[Matthew] speaks of those offenses that brethren find it difficult to “cover.” If a matter is likely to rattle around inside or carry over till the next day, it should be handled. To put it another way, if an offense drives a wedge between Christian brothers, the wedge must be removed by reconciliation.”

v. 15 - “if he listens to you, you have won your brother.”

With that, we look to the next part of Scripture in verse 15, which states, “If he listens to you, you have won your brother.” Here, we begin to see the motivations of church discipline, namely the reconciliation of the sinning brother, the wandering sheep. Hence the phrase, “you have won your brother.”

Now, we want to walk through this scenario as if we are the brother being confronted. Let’s say that you have sinned against a brother in private and he comes to you and says, “My brother in Christ, I love you and for the glory of God desire to make you aware that you have been sinned against me.” How will you respond? Will you be defensive? Will you launch a counterattack? Will you admit your sin but excuse it? There is a book titled Hitting the Marks by Barry York and he provides four characteristics of the ideal response when we are the one whose sin is being revealed to us. He says:

1) Pray for a teachable spirit. David cried out, “Teach me your way, O Lord, that I may walk in your truth; unite my heart to fear your name” (Psalm 86:11). One way that God teaches us is by the loving correction of a brother or sister in Christ.

2) Do not counterattack or be defensive “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.” (Proverbs 18:17) Also, James tells us to be “quick to hear.” So, listen to your brother or sister patiently.

3) Respond with appropriate action Accept the correction, repent, and ask for forgiveness. Or if you’re not ready to accept the correction at the time, ask for time to pray. In prayer, seek clarity regarding the truth of what the brother has spoken and get back to him.

4) Remember that accepting rebuke is to your glory, not your shame. Proverbs 15:31 states, “The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise.” The word of God is profitable for reproof and correction, so if your brother or sister comes in the name of the Lord and corrects you with the Word, receive your sanctification with gladness and be reconciled to your brother.[2]

v. 16 - “But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED. 17 - If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.”

I will not speak on the second and third steps of church discipline in detail at this time, but I will advise you that if you ever think you need to gather two or three witnesses to confront a brother, involve your pastors/elders. You do not have to tell them specifics, but you should receive their guidance on how and if to proceed. I say “if” because it is possible that your motives or memory may be faulty, your initial conversation is enough to invoke in you a love that covers their sin, or that with some more time, God will change their mind and they will receive your correction. It takes a specifically evil and demonic type of sin to progress from step 1 to 2 to 3 rapidly. Usually, there will be a time gap between each step before progressing. The more people that get involved, the higher the cost can be to bring a brother in. So, if we ever have to move beyond step 1, we want to ensure that it is absolutely necessary.

Remember that every step in the church discipline process has three goals in mind: 1) to honor and preserve the name of God, 2) for the welfare of His church, and 3) for the sake of the offenders. The goal is not to be right or have your feelings assuaged. The goal is to honor your God by being his hands and feet in the process of helping him by going and getting lost sheep.

Conclusion

Calvin recognizes the delicacy of the situation when one goes to reveal the sins of another to them, writing, “there is no other way of avoiding offence, than by every man winking at the faults of others, and thus what is evil would be encouraged by forbearance. Christ therefore prescribes a middle course, which does not give too great offence to the weak, and yet is adapted to cure their disease; for that severity which is employed as a medicine is profitable and worthy of praise.”[3] Here, Calvin is saying that we must not fail to enact the first step of church discipline, otherwise sin will become encouraged. However, if we speak harsh words in harsh ways toward those who have sinned against us in private, we will offend our brothers. Calvin views Church Discipline as the middle ground that does not ignore sin but also does not crush the weak or easily offend. But it is his last line that I want us to meditate on today. He says, “for that severity which is employed as a medicine is profitable and worthy of praise.”

This is an admission of the adage, “no pain, no gain.” Yes, it may be uncomfortable and awkward. Oh well. If a little social discomfort is the price of obedience to God, then we must be willing to both give and receive God-honoring correction that protects the purity of our church and reconciles our brother back into the fold and to the Good Shepherd.

We close with Paul’s words in Galatians 6:1, “Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted.”

[1] Jay Adams, The Christian Counselor’s Manual: The Practice of Nouthetic Counseling (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1973), 56-57.

[2] Barry York, Hitting the Marks: Restoring the Essential Identity of the Church (Pittsburgh, PA: Crown & Covenant Publications, 2018), Kindle.

[3] John Calvin, Commentary on a Harmony of the Evangelists, Matthew, Mark, and Luke Vol. 1 (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Books, 2003), 352.